Sometimes I stay up too late on a weeknight

Sometimes I stay up too late on a weeknight because I don't want to go to bed, because that means I have to go to work in the morning. Sometimes I just want more time to relax before I have to jump on the hamster wheel again.

day 10972

Stress. I can see how it ruins peoples lives and health. This job has brought me the greatest stress I have ever experienced in my life. For me, stress especially comes when I have no control over a frustration situation. A workload that is too heavy, and not enough people capable or willing to help out...that's where I'm finding the most stress these days.

I have lovely moments at work from time to time. Last week, I picked up some refugees from the airport, and I got to welcome them by placing sashes around their neck, which is tradition. One of their family members who arrived last year handed me the scarves, and one by one they came up to me and I placed it around their necks. One of them gave me an awkward hug and a lot of them shook my hand (it was a family of 6). Sometimes the tradition happens at airport arrivals, and sometimes it doesn't. But I've never gotten to do it before. And that same night, I got to eat a lot of great Nepali food. Yum. Then today, I was able to bring over their lost luggage, and the elders in the family came up to me one by one, bowed their heads low, and told me "Namaste", I'm assuming out of gratitude for helping find their luggage. Not something I experience every day.

Wedding planning actually is a lot of fun these days. It has grown on me now that we are getting things done and starting to see how things are coming together. I like looking online at stuff. I like working on the budget. I like all of it. I'm looking forward to the day. It's great to have something like that to look forward to. :0)

I am going to start running again in the mornings, I think, before the summer heat really kicks in. I think that'll help me manage my stress. I'm eager to get back into a training plan. I think it'll be good for me.

combating boredom

I've been feeling bored and stuck lately. In retaliation, I'm trying to mix up my schedule as much as I can. Today I ran with a woman who volunteered with my program last year. She invited me out on these weekly runs she's going on to train for a triathlon. She did the NY marathon last year. It was really fun to run with a new person, run on a new route, and just run without thinking of mileage or time. It was also fun because we ran into Iowa, over a really cool bridge, along a river, and we turned around at a casino. It was drizzling out, but that was alright.

I went into work early today, just for kicks, to mix up my work schedule. And also, because I knew I HAD to leave work on time to go run today, and I wanted to give myself as much time as I could to get the stuff done for the day. Maybe tomorrow I'll take a different route to work.

These days I really feel my 7 wing:
Key Motivations: Want to maintain their freedom and happiness, to avoid missing out on worthwhile experiences, to keep themselves excited and occupied, to avoid and discharge pain.

quote

I came across this quote today and found it very interesting:

"As I considered the many possessions I owned and couldn’t let go of, I came to realize the inertia was all about grief. I don’t think grief has a half-life. I think it is always there, undiminished, and it merely gets covered over by other experiences."


From a NYT article by Avery Corman. 

aunt/niece

I haven't blogged since I met my niece about 2 weeks ago. She was cute, just a little alien-looking, but not too bad. I got to help my sister and brother-in-law a little bit. I loved holding my niece and probably spoiled her a little bit. My favorite moment was right before I left. She had been trying to suck on her hand, but eventually gave up, but left it halfway in her mouth. I was holding her up and rubbing the back of her neck with my finger and I thought she was asleep, but I looked and she was wide awake and still and relaxed and comforted.

At work, it's pretty much a rule that if a young adult comes and they lost their parents, or they leave their parents behind, their aunts and/or uncles will insist that their niece or nephew lives with them. I have seen aunts and uncles act like parents to them. I get that now. :0)

The whole trip was generally a lot of fun. I saw many friends and family members, some that I hadn't seen in quite some time, including my pool league team. Man, I miss Thursday nights with those guys. There were many other people I would have liked to see, but my time was limited.

Work has been busy. Sometimes I feel like my identity lies primarily in my work, and that kinda bugs me. I mean, it's fulfilling and rewarding most days, but I want to be more than just my job. I want to be able to talk about more than just my job.

I have been training pretty hard for my half-marathon in May. I joined another one of those weight loss competitions at my gym, but this time I'm doing it in conjunction with my half-marathon training, so that should be fun to see what I can do in this time. I'm having some fun fiddling around with nutrition, trying some new foods in my diet, cutting out really bad foods, seeing if I notice any difference in energy levels or how my body feels and operates. Also, I am waiting endlessly for a certain phone call...

one bag

Today at work I helped my Cuban clients move into their new apartment. It was 3 weeks coming, but we finished it today (except for some chairs for their kitchen table). We went to pick up a bunch of their stuff from their host home. There were about 12 bags full of random stuff; clothes, shoes, coats, sheets, curtains, and stuff. The father of the family said, "We came to America with one bag...." as he looked at the piles of stuff. It was a thoughtful and reflective comment. I have really enjoyed working with the Cuban family. I was a little worried when we had a week to prepare for them, but it has turned out quite well. They are educated and curious and eager and capable. The father is even handy around the house. I enjoy being able to communicate with them, since I can't with most of my clients. They're generally really, really wonderful people. I'm privileged to help guide them through their first few months in America.

On another note, I get to go to Michigan this week. I'm really excited to meet my new niece! I also have plans to hang out with my old pool league team. I miss pool league a lot, so I'm very happy that I can be in town for a Thursday night. I'm very much looking forward to this trip.

vamlumatimes

As a follow up to my last venting post, I felt so sick the next day with uncontrollable coughing and feeling winded when I stood up and walked 5 steps from a chair, I went to urgent care. The doctor took a chest x-ray because he was concerned with how my lungs sounded. The x-ray turned out okay, so after a flu test and a nebulizer, he just told me it was a bad virus, and told me he'd give me a note so that I wouldn't have to work for the rest of the week (which was Thursday night and all of Friday, but that was going to be a lot of hours for me). I went back to the office quickly, and ran one other quick errand, but then I went home to rest for a few days. It was pretty great. I got a lot of cleaning and organizing done around the house over the next few days. When I went back to work on Monday, I felt relaxed and way less stressed out.  Today, Tuesday, I started to feel stressed out again, but not nearly as bad as last week. Also, I don't have to go to the airport at all this week, which always makes me feel better.

Today was Valentine's Day, which is not something I really care about. Me & Kurt were going to make fajitas (more Kurt than me, probably), but he had a terrible day at work, so he wasn't feeling up to it, so we went to Waverly's Trackside Bar & Grill. It was pretty fun. We played keno. He made a pattern of a heart on his keno sheet, then we had ice cream sandwiches. Then we went back to my place and watched King of the Hill.

He didn't win anything with his quarter games, but I won $7 with my $1 game!